Actress on theatre stage dressed in red polka dot dress with bloodied apron over it, knig=fe in one hand and melon in another. Image from theatre production Charolais.


A surreal, black comedy of love, longing and one woman’s intense rivalry with a Charolais heifer. Set on a farm in rural Ireland, Siobhan is forced to share the affections of her farmer boyfriend with the other women in his life – a sneering mother-in-law figure, and a sexy French cow. This is a muddy place of simmering desire, mixing the challenges of farming life and the joy of sex.

Premiered at Dublin Fringe Festival (2014), toured in Ireland (2015, 2016) and to Edinburgh (2015), Geneva and Wales (2016).

LITTLE GEM AWARD – Dublin Fringe Festival
BEST MONOLOGUE BOUQUET – Edinburgh Fringe Festival

‘a fast-paced, witty, and intensely emotional tale filled with laughter, loss and despair ★★★★ Irish Times
all Gallic sexiness, luxuriating in a French accent, and conveying what an unsophisticated Irish girl might not otherwise be able to” ★★★★ Irish Examiner

Written and performed by Noni Stapleton
Directed by Bairbre Ní Chaoimh
Produced by Tom Dowling
Costume by Miriam Duffy
Sound Design by Jack Cawley
Lighting Design by Colin Maher
Set Design by Tom Dowling
Dramaturgy by Gavin Kostick
Images by Sally-Anne Kelly and Futoshi Sakauchi